Less Me  

181lbs.

HCG shot – 150 mcg levothyroxin – .5 mg alprazolam.

New vitamin supplements.  Cleanse supplement.   Vitamin D-3 gelcap-2 – 10000IU.  L-Carnitine – 1000mg.  L-Tyrosine – 1000mg.

1 adkins caramel cafe shake-160cal.  cauliflower soup-117cal.  cauliflower soup-117cal.  1 magic wild berry splash shake -70cal.  cabbage & spinach soup w/ 3 oz chicken breast-150cal.    TOTAL CALORIES – 614.

9 17oz bottle water.

no exercise.

I overate by 168 calories yesterday.  We’re going to have to work on this.  Hubby brought fruit into the house – it was gone in 10 minutes.  I haven’t had fruit in 2 months.  I don’t want to pat myself on the back, but not bad for a cheat, eh?  Normally cheating involves 800-1500 calories.  Although not sticking to the 500 calories isn’t good, it could have been so much worse.

I am allowed to exercise a little with this diet.  The headaches have been so bad, I haven’t been able to.  I was told they would go away next week.  I will use my time this week writing out my work out routines for the remaining days and posting them.  It was really cool being able to pull the blog up and access the routine last week.

Some of yesterday’s eating felt like emotional eating.  Counseling session #4.  It was a difficult session.  My hunger felt controlled before the session.  After the session, I was starving.  I had an extra shake mid afternoon.  Then, at dinner, with the fruit, I gorged myself.  I’m trying really hard to just do the diet without concern.  This is the first week.  It doesn’t matter if I lose this week.  Just that I get used to the 500 calories, the hcg shots and the headaches.  Next week, I can incorporate the weight training into it and then we’ll see.

Tomorrow I meet with my internist.  She is hesitant to talk about my weight.  I need her to get involved with this.  While much of the current fatness is from eating and reducing calories, something must be wrong.  I know life isn’t about what if’s, but sometimes it is helpful with problem-solving.  So, what if last year I was able to spend the 4 months riding 200 miles a week, restricting calories and I lost a normal amount of weight?  Would my choices for the rest of the year been different?  What if this year the riding and dieting had given some results?  Would I be in a different place now?

I wonder how many overweight people that are metabolically resistant have grown weary from doing some exercise and dieting, only to see limited to no results.  During my 30 day shake diet, when I would ride 30 miles, I gained weight.  For those of you exercising now, what would that do for your motivation? (and no, having ridden for 10 years, I do not build/add muscle when I ride.)  Anyway…